He draweth out the thread of his verbosity*
I was doing a piece on the 2001 election in a similar vein to the one I did on 1992, which has turned from a post into an essay. * Probably John Major’s best set-piece gag, when he said to Neil Kinnock...
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Totally Misguided Forehead Display
New Brazilian 17-year old wizard Kerlon has invented* a new trick. He balances the ball on his head and runs with it. Any attempt to kick it off will be dangerous play, seeing how you’re aiming to...
View ArticleThings I never thought I’d hear myself say (food and drink section) – No. 1*
‘I wish there was an Upper Crust here’ Edinburgh Aiport yesterday, on discovering that there was bugger all food to be had for breakfast in the departure lounge. * ooh look – it’s another Freaky...
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Light Years Ahead
Stadiums shared by two football teams have been seen as problematic for many reasons; one of the major objections is the difficulty in making a joint stadium feel like home for two groups of people. In...
View ArticlePollwatch – 10.20am
After 2 hours number taking, I can report a brisk trade in the Blackheath Westcombe ward. Turnout is about 10% after 3 hours – pretty good I’d say. My favourite moment was a 16 year old kid taking me...
View ArticlePollwatch – 2.40pm
Danny Baker has voted, along with his daughter and, I presume, his partner. An old woman wanted to check that her vote would be valid as she’d put a tick, not a cross. I assured her that as long as it...
View ArticleWorst idea ever*
Please don’t do dis dis dis dis dis dis dis gol * Apart from anything Sepp Blatter’s said.
View ArticleClarence Beeks lives!
BBC News 24 Interviewer to David Attenborough in story about decline in numbers of mountain gorilla: “So, what were they like to work with?” They were actors in gorilla suits all along!
View ArticleHelena Handcart writes…
This is revisionism. Tiswas custard* pies were totally non-diary products (good for the allergic amongst us). They were rubbish 1970s shaving foam, without any balms, aloe, pro-vitamin Cell Block H or...
View ArticleThe essence of football
It’s injury time between Heybridge Swifts and AFC Wimbledon and the wombles are 1-0 down. The keeper has the ball and the guy standing near the cameraman in this video captures the essence of football…
View ArticleBoot on other foot
I’m a deeply amateur fisherman; given that I don’t even eat fish, my fishing is more like the nastier blood sports in its complete lack of utility. I’ve spend 2 days fishing on Loch Awe over the August...
View ArticleThe FT Top 23 STRANGE PHENOMENA: No.12 Dopplegangers
Make mine a double Dopplegangers have become confused in the public mind, it seems to me. In modern parlance, it seems to be much more ‘someone who looks like me’ rather than ‘my malevolent double’....
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Bad Tony Benn
We knew he shut down Radio Caroline but well will history judge him now we know he was key to stopping nationalisation of the breweries in the 1970s? Bloody left methodist fun hating tradition bah...
View ArticleQuit Stallin’, Call in Stalin*
Jonathan Meades’ show last night on Stalin and Architecture was so annoying. It promised to be a welcome exposition on a often-derided subject that’s generally dismissed glibly in one fell swoop. But...
View ArticleI thought the article that Mark refers to
I thought the article that Mark refers to by David Runciman’s in the LRB was a necessary corrective to the myth of the manager he rightly takes to task. It’s analogous to the concept of the super-CEO....
View ArticleSpread it, Big Man!*
At the risk of sounding like Julie Burchill, Football is a bit gay. Tom highlights the interesting references in the Runciman piece about this, and it really is a subject that doesn’t get much...
View ArticleBest non-sequitur ever
In this interview, football agent Jerome Anderson responds to a question about there the bad impression of agents comes from. He can only speak for himself, he says. ‘I had a place at university to...
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Dave’s World Cup Spreadsheet
This year’s World Cup Spreadsheet is now live. It’s being hosted on the Football Supporters International site, which is a guide for fans, by fans, produced by a coalition of European supporters’...
View ArticleNot very ago, at a stadium really quite close by
Everton have a player called Dax Hoogerwerf who is from Blackpool. Meanwhile, in a cantina bar somewhere in a galaxy far far away, an old Jedi and his apprentice try and strike a deal with a space...
View ArticleTea Making Fearnley-Whittingstall Dangle
Hugh Duncan Fearnley-Whittingstall talks about making a cup of tea Now, to make my tea, I need two good-sized mugs. I boil the kettle. The hot water goes into one mug first, stays for a few seconds so...
View ArticleLow-rent Keith Flett
I’ve always been a bit of a letter writer and have had periods of being a bit of a radio phone-in caller (=when I wasn’t getting any attention from girls at school), so I’m rather pleased to have had a...
View ArticleStraight from the kick-off. Really.
It’s a cliche in football that a team is most vulnerable when they have just scored. It’s doubtful that the clichemongers had this in mind when thinking about just how vulnerable you can be. It’s bound...
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Pie Debate Solved
The pie debate has been rumbling on FT since the dawn of time itself. For the uninitiated, the positions can broadly be termed the performativists and the formalists. The latter attempt to draw a line...
View ArticlePut it on our tab
Put it on our tab The spate of clubs going into some form of adminsitration recently has provided a fascinating look at the ways in which clubs operate through looking at who they owed money to. Hull...
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Publog Picture Quiz
Publog Picture Quiz What is this? a) A prawn? b) A Locust? c) The hairest pork scratching in the world ever, as discovered in a packet of these bought from The Sekforde Arms on Friday night. Apologies...
View ArticleWhat happened next
What happened next Portraits of the German 1974 World Cup Winning Team from a recent edition of Der Spiegel. The same pages washed through Google’s translate tool are here in case you wanted to read...
View ArticleIf you sing Blue Moon it’ll all be over soon
If you sing Blue Moon it’ll all be over soon A starting discovery after an ill-advised trip to the dodgy late-serving Irish bar on Caledonian Road near Kings Cross (is the dodgy necessary or already...
View ArticleTotally Magnificent Football Diversions
Totally Magnificent Football Diversions I regularly visit the messageboard associated with When Saturday Comes and two recent threads have provided much amusement and interest which to me represent the...
View ArticleUtterly Resolute
Utterly Resolute I don’t care how cold that cold day in hell might be, but nothing I’d rather freeze than wear one of these. I have resolved to never, ever, ever buy one for anyone I know. There is...
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National Treasure
National Treasure I’d been wanting to see this since I saw the Trailer about 8 months back. Bad reviews had made me worried, but not so much; I thought I’d watch 2 hours of reasonably good rubbish. I...
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The like that dare not speak it’s name
The like that dare not speak it’s name There are worse players who have played for England and Manchester United than Phil Neville, and better ones too. But he seems to me to be singled out as he forms...
View ArticleYou Dirty Old Bugger
You Dirty Old Bugger “My wife and I were very shocked but we watched it until the end because we couldn’t believe what we were seeing.”
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I Heart Germany
I Heart Germany In Club Bastard in Berlin this weekend, I spotted and advert for the International Football Film Festival. Brilliant – a festival packed with football films, and I’ll miss it. All those...
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Hardcore, but they don’t know the score
Hardcore, but they don’t know the score Midnight. Berlin. You want to go a club. You see the sign: It looks the part. Reassuringly brusque bouncer. Cool Berliners moving to German art-rock sounds. And...
View ArticleFootball goes Pop
Football goes Pop At 2.58 on the public address system at AFC Wimbledon vs Croydon on Saturday we heard Schanppi das Kleine Krokodil which I think is a UK first. Brilliant. PS – new striker Andrew...
View ArticleI don’t like Wednesdays…
I don’t like Wednesdays… …for the FA Cup final. Daft proposal ahoy from the FA. Basically, they have to give players a month off before the 2006 World Cup. The only way they can fit all this football...
View ArticleOutfield Goalies
Outfield Goalies You don’t see them much these days, what with three subs being drawn from five named replacements. I have to confess it’s my favourite thing in football. I like seeing an amateur...
View ArticleUses of Political Correctness Gone Mad
Uses of Political Correctness Gone Mad Dominic Fifield, in The Guardian, writing about the aftermath of the Carling Cup Final: Jose Mourinho had offered his opposing captain a warm handshake in the...
View ArticleNum Num Tom Yum
Num Num Tom Yum About 18 months ago, I wrote about how my favourite noodles had seemingly disappeared. Blue Dragon Tom Yum RIP. I eventually wrote to Blue Dragon, who advised me to go to their SE...
View ArticleWho designed a supply chain like this
Who designed a supply chain like this Loyd Grossman’s Tomato and Chilli sauce is basically the arabbiata in their range of sauces, but it knocks every other version – Sacla, Sainsbury’s Safeway,...
View ArticleWill the last person to leave the FA please turn off the lights
Will the last person to leave the FA please turn off the lights Some readers who have heard me on the subject of the FA and the Premier League will be aware of my general view that The FA is staffed by...
View ArticleWaiting for the Great Leap Forwards – 1992
1992 was when I lost my political virginity. I can remember little of the 87 campaign, save for the post-poll Spitting Image. The lack of any discernible tension was exemplified by the finale to that...
View ArticleAnd then there was one
What if she dies before polling day? Would a Thatcher factor benefit the Tories? In 2001, I worked in a constituency where the Tories were strongly tipped. People reported that the visit of Thatcher...
View ArticleFor enquiring minds who want to know
They Work For You is a great site – a much quicker search facility of the Parliament site, all the info from the latter is there at the former, available as RSS with email alerts when particular...
View Article1992 Postscript
On Saturday April 10th 1992, The Guardian published a results special. It had a full page Steve Bell cartoon that remains the most powerful piece of cartoonery I’ve ever seen. I’m no big fan, and get...
View ArticleAll Politics is Local
The 2001 Election by Dave Boyle I was on pins for the 2001 election. For most of the country, it seemed a foregone conclusion, but the marginal I was working in, we didn’t have a clue. We knew that...
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